What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer? A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement? Not enough cement.
What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo? The lawyer charges more.
Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers? New Jersey got to pick first.
Why to lawyers wear neckties? To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.